What a month! First, I'm so happy that the first month is over, I feel like I just jumped a major hurdle and am now accelerating towards that finish line (I know, I know, it's a long race)...but I'm building that endurance!! I must tell you guys that on Day one of this journey, I was soooooo scared and somehow thought that I may not make it to the end of this month. How was I going to get through 30 days with no chocolate, no coke (coca-cola, that is!), and no McDonalds???? In my mind I just knew I would crack and go to McDonalds. Well, here's what a month of discipline, hard work, and dedication has done for me:
I went to the McDonald's drive through today (why, I think I convinced myself that my son wanted it, or something), I rolled down my window and waited for that distorted voice to say, "welcome to McDonalds, may I take your order?" I took a deep breath and said, "uh, yeah, uh, can I uh have a 4-pc chicken nugget happy meal with apple juice for a boy (you gotta specify the gender so you get the right toy - my husband would definitely have that "WTF" look on his face if he walked in and saw our 2yr old son playing with a Barbie).
Anyway, the voice in the box then said, "anything else?"....there was a long, akward silence. In the past the next words out of my mouth would've been, "BigMac combo with supersize fries and a Coke, no ice please..oh and an Apple Pie (I always say,
"OH and an apple pie" as if I forgot or something when I knew all along that I would order it). My mind was racing, I start rationalizing in my head, "it's just me and my two year old in the car, hubby's at work, won't be home for hours, I could eat and destroy the evidence before he even gets close to home, no one would ever know, he wouldn't even smell it" Again I hear, "Anything else???" .....I quickly answer, "uh, just a minute please", I continue thinking some more.
At this point I'm talking softly to myself, "Joania, what are you doing, say NO THANK YOU!! say NO THANK YOU!!! Remember your Journey, your journey!!!" The voice comes back on, "Ma'am, anything else?"....."Uh, I wou--, uh I don't think so!" She then tells me the total and I drive to the next window. I know I've been happy to see the McDonalds girl in the past but this time it was for a different reason. It wasn't because my mouth was salivating for that Big Mac, it was beacuase I stayed strong!! When she slid that little window to take the cash...I smiled and said like an idiot, "phew, I didn't order anything, I didn't order anything!" She looked at me with a puzzled face which I interpreted as, "please don't make me cancel this order". When I realized what I said, I quickly corrected myself and said, "I didn't order anything ELSE ..THANK YOU..." I'm such a dork!
Anyway, I drove to the next window, picked up the bag, which btw looked so small compared to the one's I got when I ordered food as well.
When we got home, I gave my son his McDonalds, AND HERE COMES THE SHOCKER, it DID NOT bother me one bit, I sat beside him eating my baked sweet potato, piece of grilled fish and some steamed veggies. IT was awesome, I felt so good and strong. I DIDN'T EVEN SWIPE A FRY, Y'ALL!!! Trust me, I'd tell you if I did...but I didn't even swipe a french fry, not one!! This may be no big deal for most, but for me...HUGE!!!
So that's why I say this month has made me so much stronger and seeing how far I've come, I really don't want to jeopardize that in anyway. Also, the thought of having to confess to all my blog readers is enough to keep me on the straight and narrow.
Anyway, just thought I'd share that. Also, I've received a lot of questions like, "16 pounds!!???!? What are you doing??" "That's a lot of weight, how did you do it??"" "16 pounds? wow, please share the secret!"
So I decided to be a bit more specific with what I'm doing. I'll write it up in my next post. Thanks for stopping by!!
J
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